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Bonkers Blog March 2011

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14 March (Part 2) - ‘Citrine’ is a book, the mayor is a lemon

Citrine's bookSo what was it I found so damned funny about the thought of Nick reading Twankey’s condescending suggestion that he should swat up on Citrine’s book on chairmanship? It was the mental picture of him putting his laptop to one side, getting out of his armchair, taking a few steps to his bookcase and taking his copy of Citrine’s ABC of Chairmanship from the shelf. Yes I know small minds are easily amused and all that but the consequences will be enormous; the mayor has in effect invited Nick to take the book to the next council meeting and pick Twankey up on each and every mistake. Let me run through some she made recently…

Paragraph 352 : ‘Questions would not be intelligible unless a few brief introductory sentences were allowed.’
Now that is a particularly nice one as council Standing Orders are in direct conflict with it. It is exactly what Phil was complaining about a week ago. He couldn’t understand any answers because the question wasn’t allowed to be heard. Citrine 1 : Twankey nil.

Paragraph 403 : ‘All speeches must be relevant to the subject, and the speaker must not stray from the point.’
So she allows Craske (TLC) to carry out a filibuster, distort the truth on the Brinckerhoff contract and insult a Bexley resident without intervention and then have the gall to defend herself in writing afterwards. Not to mention the dishonest Standards Board supporting her too. Citrine 2 : Twankey nil.

Paragraph 430 : ‘If … there is an error in, or an omission from the minutes [you] should insist on the error being rectified.’
Last week she rudely tried to shut Nick Dowling up when he with the good of residents in mind brought an error to Twankey’s attention. Citrine 3 : Twankey nil.

Paragraph 442 : ‘You will never achieve success unless you are absolutely impartial.’
Lets Conservatives ramble and cuts Labour councillors’ speeches short. Citrine 4 : Twankey nil.

Paragraph 444 : ‘See that speakers do not exceed their time limit.’
Public cut short by four minutes. Councillors allowed an extra five minutes. Citrine 5 : Twankey nil.

Paragraph 456 : ‘It is really no compliment to an audience for a speaker … to get up and spout. They expect something better than mere generalities.’
We are back to O’Neill, Campbell and Craske’s waffling and insults again. Citrine 6 : Twankey nil.

This is déjà vu all over again! It is so like when Andrew Bashford of the road planning department tried to shut me up by referring to some obscure Transport Research Laboratory report on road design, saying he had followed its advice so I must be wrong with my criticisms. Hard luck on Bashford that the head of the TRL department that issued the report is a personal friend and so I got a free copy of the report and a free road inspection. When will these over-paid public servants stop treating us as fools? Bashford hadn’t read the report and Twankey hasn’t read the book, or if she did she has forgotten every last vestige of Citrine’s advice. She has opened a can of worms for herself, I shall be having fun with her mistakes for weeks to come. No, much longer than that!

Clicking the image reveals extracts from the book. Feel free to read it Twankey. Ask nicely and Nick might lend you his copy.


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